I don't know if any of you have seen this ...

But recently Meghan McCain uploaded a picture that set the conservative Twittersphere on fire. I'll put the picture in just ... here:

So, take that in if you would.

She posted it, ostensibly because she was hanging out at home on a Saturday night and reading a Warhol biography. Also, if you look very closely, you'll see she has breasts.

The twitter/internet response was INSANE. On the fairly liberal and male Digg.com, which is to the Internet what behind the Stop 'n Sip is to the Midwest, the reaction had a "stupid conservative floozy"/"I'd put my dick in that" inflection. There will always be kids on the Internet, I guess.

All she's doing in this picture is showing off a book and having breasts. Ogling her is fine if you do it in the comfort of your own home and don't give public voice to the notion that chicks are first and foremost for ogling. It's the difference between saying "that woman who reads has intriguing breasts," and, "thank god the breasts partially obscured by that book had a woman to ride into the frame of this picture on!" You see the difference?

Also, calling a conservative a whore for being sexy is missing the point of social liberalism you jackasses. You can't turn conservatives' own punitive worldview on them when they demonstrate sexiness, because it's not them we're fighting, you jerks, it's their worldview.

Speaking of the conservative response, the worst comment I've seen so far is this:
"You knew you were posting a nearly NSFW [not safe for work] photo, so don't pretend like you're surprised at people's reaction,"

NSFW is probably a useful notion, because it stops you from opening up a picture that might create a "hostile work environment" for some people. Who those people are is generally implicit in your culture's notions of decency. The idea of "nearly NSFW" is looney.

It's not as though the person sending something labled "NSFW" is saying - "don't look at this filth!" They're saying, look at this filth later, when only consulting adults are around. Nearly NSFW, or NNSFW, just means "NSFW if there are a lot of prudes around". I'm offended by NNSFW because it's retrogressive. It suggests we're not being prudish enough yet.

I think we already do a number on women's self-image by insisting that female sexuality is somehow irreconcilable with brains or seriousness. Just because boobs make us guys momentarily stupid and licentious doesn't mean we should project those characteristics on their owners. So, hey conservatives, quit it! We don't need to go any further backwards on this.

Watch this space

There's talk about maybe a new article being published.

The Internet will hate me for it, so that'll be exciting. I'll post a link from here when it's up.

If you're in D.C. ...

... and can go see Psychosis 4.48 performed by Factory 449 ...

Don't.

It's terrible. I was reminded of Dorothy Parker saying of Katherine Hepburn, "she runs the gamut of emotions from A to B".

If the essential question of the play was "how does suicide arise from depression" then the director's answer seems to be delivered by asking the actors to "play crazy to the hilt!" Yeah, crazy! That's the ticket. It strikes me as odd that out of 10 actors and a director none seemed to have any experience with sadness or considering suicide. Did they all miss high school?

Anyway, don't go see it. I've already invested more emotion in this review than I felt throughout the whole play.

You must be effing kidding me

Decrying the lows to which movie studios will sink is a pastime that could quickly eat up all your time for the foreseeable future. Nevertheless, I've gotta say something about this crap:

http://thebox-movie.warnerbros.com/

I guess it's based on a short story, but that short story is based on a moral dilemma. What's next, "The Woman or the Painting", "To Steal Medicine for Your Sick Mother or Not!"?

Try harder Hollywood. Try. Harder.

I'm probably dying ...

... of hand.

I have to go get an MRI of a lump in my hand. I don't really think it's a big deal, but you know better safe than something or other.

I've always tried not to worry until worrying does some good. Often I try not to worry even after it's demonstrably a good time to freak the hell out. However, I'm worried now, not so much about the fact that I'm almost certainly about to die of the nations 1Mth most dangerous killer - hand gophers! - but because I'm scheduled for an MRI ... with contrast.

I've never had an MRI of any sort, - with contrast, with bananas, or with a happy ending. However, I was with a woman who was toughing it out while passing a kidney stone once.

Wait, I'm tying it back to the story.

She's a certifiable bad-ass. I expect Chuck Norris couldn't pass a kidney stone without at least tearing up, but this ole girl sure did. I've never developed so much respect for a person in one nighttime.

And stay up all night with her I did, trying to help her navigate the medical system - (which blows in this country btw, and I'm not just saying that; seriously, travel to other countries before you decide the USA is still the best at anything). The only thing that almost caused our heroine to give up and just walk out of the hospital, while still suffering from an undiagnosed pain that most people who've been through both describe as worse than childbirth, was when the doctor threatened a second MRI with contrast.

I had to physically restrain the steely old bird and I think I only managed that because she was already in dire scalding pain.

I'm horrified. It's like going into the hospital with a broadsword up your urethra, but being like, you know, resigned to it, then deciding that this one test is just too much to bear.

I'm not even worried about MRIs in general. Some people get tetchy about them because you have/get to get inside a huge metal tube. I, of course, will be pretending I'm being fitted for a robo-exoskeleton, so no worries there. I'm also not really claustrophobic.

Some people whine because they're loud. So are robot battle suits you pansies.

No, I'm whining because apparently adding the words "with contrast" means they inject hot magma into your arm or something and somehow that's less comfortable than passing a shard of uric acid through the most minute and tender plumbing of your amazingly gentle bits.

In the immortal words of a that cell-phone abusing whalebird, Twitter, "FML".

Anecdote 1

Er, I think you'll find that's a katana. Jeez.

I was leaving work for lunch yesterday and who should get on the elevator but a woman dressed in business attire, but, you know, carrying a broadsword (of course it was a broadsword - I didn't play all that D&D for nothing you know).

She was carrying it without the least self-consciousness - until I said out loud to my friend "is she carrying a broadsword?" Then she sort of turned away from my friend a bit.

Best of all, in direct compliance with my prayers, she did in fact get off the elevator on the floor where I work. Unfortunately she went to the right instead of the left, suggesting she works for the law firm over there.

I'm baffled, I admit.

Fuck

This somehow feels even more weirdly violating than that whole Tesh thing.

http://danielharrisonband.com/default.aspx

I'm sure he's totally nice and stuff, and I know I'm not totally fair in my distrust of folks who are zealous about anything, particularly religion, but sheesh!

I'm pooped

I feel like I've had about 10 hours of sleep out of the last 54, but that's only because it's true.

I'm about an hour from trippy lucid-daydream hallucinations I think, so I might stay up just for that. I also want to start using my Google Wave account, but I found it confusing enough without being wrecked on wakefulness, so I might put that off til later.

Oh, the hallucinations have started early. My totem unicorn tells me it's time to go iron some shirts for next week. He's very concerned I look good for work.

My age

A coworker today underestimated my age by at least six years. While that's awesome for me, it's going to be even funnier for certain members of my family.

That's because I forgot to mention that my sister, who lives locally and is 4 years younger (plus smarter and probably wealthier) than I (just like her twin, incidentally), has been mistaken for my older sister a couple of times recently.

I don't think I want to make too much of it, because probably the reason has more to do with my actions than how we each look. Still, as a proper older brother, I will make fun. Of course, she's married, has a career she likes, and has her crap together, so whatever.